So I’ve come to believe I am the World’s Most Boring Blogger.
Ever.
During my never-ending IF treatments, I guess I always had some drama going on. Hundreds of doctors’ appointments, new treatments, different meds, a new plan, a new cycle starting, another two week wait…something.
Why does being pregnant, after all of these years, seem so much less interesting after all of that? I mean to other people. Not to me. I fear that it’s so boring for you all. Don’t get me wrong, I’m thrilled and happy beyond belief to be pregnant. And so, so grateful that so far, things are going well.
But I guess I worry that people reading will just be bored to tears with my updates. I’ve tried to spice it up a bit, what with my tales of acne from hell, hair growth that defies all explanation and the like. But truly, how often can you read about some pregnant lady’s bad skin and beard growth?
But for those two or three of you who are interested, here’s where I’m at:
12 weeks and 4 days today.
The morning sickness (which would pop up on and off all day but was never terrible) is getting better. (Thank God, the nation’s supply of Saltines might be safe after all.)
I am still eating pickles every day. My acupuncturist says the vinegar is good for my liver. I say they just taste so fricking good. Dill, whole pickles. When BeBop brings home a different brand or the wrong variety of dill pickle (not whole but sliced? WTF dude, who wants those??) the entire neighborhood can probably hear me yell, "Nononononononononono!" like a spoiled little brat.
(Speaking of spoiled little brats, I can’t say my mood is always cheery and bright. When BeBop asked me why my car was so dirty, I told him because of the trees I have to park under at work. "But why is that white stuff so sticky?" he asked. "I don’t KNOW! I’m not a fricking arborist!!" I yelled, just like a snotty tweener.)
I’m off the Prednisone and, as of last Sunday, the Metformin. I’ll stay on baby aspirin, Folgard, thyroid and the pre-natals for the duration. It feels great to not be taking a thousand different medications twice a day like a little old lady.
Weight gain? Oooof. I’ve been very careful, really! And still, I’m too embarrassed to write it down. I’m not eating for three, I’m not even really eating for two, but yet the pounds are piling on. Three different people so kindly noticed last week and said that I was looking ‘quite big’ for being three months along. Well fuck you very much. And good day. (I blame it on the goddamn pickles, which are just little sodium delivery systems disguised as delicious snack food. Surely THAT’S making me retain gallons of water, no?)
I haven’t had any round ligament pain yet, but GOOD LORD the foot cramps! Holy hell those suckers are painful. They usually strike at night, when I’m in a deep slumber. All of a sudden, I will awaken from said slumber and literally bolt straight in the air and out of bed in one movement, as if BeBop had placed a stick of dynamite in my corn hole and lit the fuse. I mean, I seriously go from a prone position to walking around the room screaming in pain in about .00005 seconds, waking the husband, the dog and probably the entire neighborhood. Good times, people.
I have to get my killer cell blood panel done again this week, and I’m praying to God and anyone else who will listen that it comes back clear, so I don’t have to do another infusion. Baby Jesus? Ganesh? Anyone?? Bueller…
I am starting to get the pre-screen jitters again. My NT scan is this Friday, and although I’ve been feeling good and very optimistic about things, in the days before my scans I notice my anxiety increases until I get the results back.
So we have talked about names. But I’m not ready to share them yet. Before we were married, we lived in San Francisco, in two different neighborhoods. One day, in that pre-marital, we’re sooo in love lalala stage, one of us said, "wouldn’t it be great if we had a boy and a girl one day, and we named them —- and —- (the streets we lived on at the time)."
"Yes, what a lovely idea," the other one said, "can you pass me the tequila?" This might also be the day one of us said, "what if we told people the kid’s name was —-, but that we call him Wolverine? That would be cool!" "Yes, that WOULD be cool," said the other one of us. "Can you be a peach and pass me the limes and salt?"
Anyway, fast forward almost ten years and here we are, about to have a boy and a girl. And I think we’re going to go with that plan, conceived (no pun intended) when we thought we’d get married in a beautiful wedding ceremony surrounded by family and friends, BeBop would work his way up the corporate ladder as a graphic designer and we’d get pregnant easily.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
And no, the names aren’t Haight and Ashbury. GAWD. Have you been to the Haight? It’s nothing but Meth addicts, people peeing on the street and head shops, so no, we won’t be naming the kids that.
And that is where I’m at today. I warned you…pretty boring. But in a good way, I hope.
Now I’m off early to go home and wax my face, in preparation for a big fete we have Saturday night for BeBop’s company. (It will probably take me between now and then to de-forest the face, I swear.)
We are going to a black tie screening of Pix.ar’s new movie, Rata.tou.ille. And if I can cram my ever-expanding self into a formal dress and my little piggy feet into some strappy heels, and stay awake past 9:00 PM, I’m sure we’ll have a glorious time.
OMG, you could NEVER be a boring blogger. I heart reading your posts. Thanks for the kind words about the baby shower. I appreciate your checking in on me and providing words of encouragement. When do we get to see the Watson bump pictures? 🙂
xoxo, Ms Planner
Hi Watson,
I don’t find your blog boring at all. In fact, I find it quite the opposite. Your posts are witty and hilarious!!! I’m also enjoying following your pregnancy story. I just got a bfp on Sunday (12dpiui) and confirmed on Tuesday (14dpiui) and today (16dpiui). I am tired and crampy, but not much else. It is funny because I’m not craving pickles, but banana peppers are my new best friend. 🙂 Please keep entertaining us with your posts and best wishes with the deforestation. Hehehehehe!
Oh good, let me know if that movie is good – it looks so cute! It is always the choice between wanting to see the cute animated flick and not break down crying at all the adorable little children…so I really need to weigh it out before I go.
I totally think it is all water weight from the pickles – totally. I’m sure you still look fabulous, Dear.
Jee-ZUS. That had to be possibly the most boring thing I have ever read. Seriously. And I’ve read ALOT of boring shit. I’m not kidding, in the middle of your post, I had to look away and stare at my wall just to watch some of the paint begin to peel, because I needed a little excitement.
Your posts are never boring, Watson. You have a devoted fan base and we’re with you through good posts and bad. Plus, if getting pregnant does mean that posts lose some of their edge and pizzaz, well then I wish boring posts for everyone.
Did you know that here in Canada you can get dill pickle potatoe chips? They are quite good! Where that came from, I am not exactly sure. I just felt that with your pickle obsession you need to know this.
And Watson, the day you are boring is the day hell freezes over!
SOOOOOOOO excited about your NT scan!!!! i totally understand the nerves, but i’m so excited for you! can’t wait to hear all about it!!
Wow, time flies! Glad your nausea is subsiding, even if your pickle cravings haven’t. How does it feel to be a cliche? ;-p
I must agree with the others who said your posts are never boring. You are such a fabulous writer!
Far from boring, my dear. Pee-myself-laughing, you is.
p.s. Would love to hear about the screening of Rat – I’m in the biz and am verrrry curious about what you think.
Dear Watson, you wouldn’t know boring if it stared at you from the bottom of a dill-pickle jar, so I wouldn’t worry too much about that. I’m glad everything is going well, though you could have been spared the foot cramps and the facial hair… but hey. Sending you all my best hopes for your scan.
Oh the foot cramps. How I loath the foot cramps. And the leg cramps. The only thing I have found to help so far is to eat a large banana everyday.
You Boring? Never.
How could we possibly be bored when you are the one writing it all down???
Ohhh you are NEVER boring–I look forward to getting my little notification on blog lines that you have updated!
You forgot about the Ben & Jerry’s down there at Haight-Ashbury. You can’t forget the ICE CREAM, man!
And I love reading everything you have to say, ALL OF THE TIME. Post a grocery list why don’t you? I dare you. You would still be able to make it funny and charming. But hey, boring is great–we want things to go well, even if that means you become a total bore. ZZZZZ.
I think all of your avid readers would agree (and I consider myself one!) that a little less drama can be a wonderful gift – one that you finally get the opportunity to enjoy!! I will still read your blog no matter what you write (or don’t write) about. You are clearly a wonderful person and an incredibly interesting writer so it is a treat to have a window into your life.
Ok, so I know that you are throwing up now with thoughts like, “Is Lady In Waiting trying to sell me something?” or “Is she a religious freak who is buttering me up before she offers me multicolored literature warning me that mosquitos are the instruments of the devil?”
The sad thing is that I am truly this sappy. And you think that YOU are boring. Humph.
I am really glad that everything is going well. Please let us know how the scan goes.
No no no no NOT boring. We want more, more facial hair, more pickles, more everything Watson. Please?
Guess you don’t come over and read my blog, eh? You want boring? There you go. 😉 I keep coming back because I know that soon your mother is going to offer up some sort of non-medical treatment, for you foot cramps or facial hair, and I dare not miss a minute. 😉 Love the blog and am so very happy that all is going well for you.
You – boring? Impossible. I’m glad to hear that things are going well. Keeping everything crossed for a good scan.
I don’t think it’s even possible for you to be boring…. Um, yeah, I just double checked – NOT POSSIBLE!
And what the eff with those folks telling you anything about your weight? How about a nice cup of the shut the f*ck up, that’s what I say!
…now I’ve got to go research the hell out of the street names in SF, thank you very much!
Did anyone else get a flashback of that 80’s film “Red Dawn” with the way they screamed “Wolverines!” all the time?
No?
Um, never mind then.
Foot and leg cramps – yes, killer pain — mean you need calcium. Doctors don’t seem to know this. My daughter is a doctor and I had to tell her when she was pregnant. So drink a glass of milk or soymilk before you go to bed. Hopefully it will help. And, you are not boring!
I’m still wondering what the problem is with Haight and Ashbury…
you aren’t boring! i love reading about everyone’s pregnancy experiences … no foot cramps for me … but i was talking calcium supplements, and i heard that helps with that … so give it a shot!
my only advice is that i wished away my pregnancy, cause i was sick through a lot of it, and i was worried about holding the twins long enough, so i just wanted it to be over so they were here and healthy and all that. Now that they are here, I wish that I had enjoyed my pregnancy more, especially since I probably won’t ever be pregnant again. Good luck with everything! I’ll be reading …
you aren’t boring! i love reading about everyone’s pregnancy experiences … no foot cramps for me … but i was talking calcium supplements, and i heard that helps with that … so give it a shot!
my only advice is that i wished away my pregnancy, cause i was sick through a lot of it, and i was worried about holding the twins long enough, so i just wanted it to be over so they were here and healthy and all that. Now that they are here, I wish that I had enjoyed my pregnancy more, especially since I probably won’t ever be pregnant again. Good luck with everything! I’ll be reading …
Honestly, I’m just happy to read about others going through the pregnancy experience – people who’ve been down a similar road leading up to the pregnancy…Other people I know (much more fertile than I of course) just don’t seem to experience it the same way. It’s reaffirming (NOT boring!) for me to read that someone else has been there before me and that this hellish nausea might in fact end at the 12 week mark!
boring? PA SHA. sometimes sadistic? sarcastic? snarky? sure, but boring? no way, no how.
Well, I will be the 26th person to say . . .no, you are in fact, NOT BORING. Really.
I do enjoy reading your pregnancy related hair growth extravaganza and pickle cravings. Makes me giggle. 🙂
I love reading about your beard.
How are you doing? haven’t been around much, is the MS playing you up?
XXX