So. Tired.
hyugthyghgb
Ooops! Sorry about that…that was my head slamming on the keyboard because me so tired after the long weekend in LA. I am still recovering.
I worked harder than a ten dollar whore.
(To be honest, my father-in-law has used that little gem in conversation before and I’ve never really understood it. Wouldn’t a ten dollar hooker sort of slack off because what’s the point?)
Anyway, what I’m trying to say is that I am fricking exhausted after my getting-ready-for-baby long weekend at my sister’s.
(Incidentally, they did let me out of the Orange County airport, but only after I registered on the "I’m not from here and will be leaving soon" watch list. Because seriously, I am still looking hideous. And that just doesn’t go over big in those parts.)
I worked my ass off for four straight days. There was so much to do, and my poor sister was literally confined to the couch or a chair we set up in the baby’s room. She would prop her feet up on the diaper genie box and we would go through piles and piles of clothes, burp clothes, towels, washcloths, blankets, bath stuff and other assorted infant-related paraphernalia.
MY GOD PEOPLE. Do little babies need so much stuff?
I can’t even tell you they went overboard. They had a few of these, a few of those, and a bunch of clothes, but nothing obscene. Of course I couldn’t help but think: Jesus H. Christ, am I going to need twice as much crap??
I had to cook and then clean up after every meal, in addition to the sorting and the twelve loads of laundry I did, so my activity level was about fourteen frillion times higher than it is at home, where I drag my lazy ass to work, get some stuff done, eat, nap and then head home to lay on the couch for a few hours.
*** *** *** ***
Can I just add to the list of Hideous Pregnancy Developments (heretofore to be called the HPDs) the UNGODLY amount of hair growing on my face?! CAN I?!?
Oh. My. Freaking. Lord.
I have to pluck my eyebrows almost every night, because the hair is growing at such a rapid pace it’s growing into my hairline, creating a frightening, almost Vampire-like appearance.
To make matters worse, my facial hair is also growing at an unbelievable rate. And it’s black hair. I was able to avoid this hirsuteness that is associated with PCOS in the past. (Except, of course, for the nipple hairs that would literally grow overnight. I swear to God, one day = no nipple hair. The next day = nipple hairs so long I could braid them into a lanyard if I had wanted to. Although I’m not sure why I would want to because that sounds uncomfortable and also? GROSS.)
But anyway…this facial hair business is crazy. I was at a stoplight the other day and had the unfortunate experience of looking in the mirror. The close proximity of my chin to the mirror, combined with the bright sunlight, created such a horrific vision I almost hit the gas pedal and crashed into the person stopped in front of me. The numbers of long, black hairs that apparently have eluded me in the bathroom mirror were staggering.
(Can you imagine the scene if I rear-ended someone and had to explain the reason? But Officer, LOOK at these WHISKERS I have growing on my chin! And I swear I pluck every night before I go to bed! I look like a billy goat, only with BLACK hair. The vision was just too scary and I lost control of my faculties. It was hair-raising, if you will…Okay, okay, ma’am. Now that I get a good look at your visage I do see what you’re talking about. I’ll let you off with a warning. And some advice: get yourself one of those high-powered, magnetic mirrors they sell at Bed, Bath & Beyond for old ladies who can’t see well. It will become your new best friend. And have a nice day.)
I would suspect BeBop of putting Rogaine in my nighttime moisturizer, but why would he be contributing to the troll-like appearance of his wife? That would be beyond cruel, wouldn’t it?
Vanessa has been blogging about hair growth on her body, fearing she might look like a Yeti by the time her twins are born.
But I’d MUCH rather have a full-length hair sweater than look like THIS, which is where I’m heading at breakneck speed:
I think it sounds wonderful: feeling awful, tired AND massive hair growth on your chinny, chin, chin? Pure heaven!!! Anyway, I’m sure it’s way more noticeable to you than to anyone else. Right? Right? It’s funny–but until Vanessa, and now you, I didn’t know that this, um, hair growth was a possibility. Yikes!
I really hate that symptom of PCOS…I would rather be twice as fat to not have facial hair!!!
Hope it gets better.
Dear Watson, first of all, a huge hug and 10,000 karma points (oh, how I wish I were in charge of distribution!) for doing all that for your sister. I’m sure she will be eternally grateful.
I’m really sorry about your hair growth — it sounds super-annoying. I’ve only gotten the excessive growth in one place (three guesses), but it’s still mind-altering. I hear things improve later on.
wowsers. poor you. i would hate that. if you have a lot of facial hair does that mean that the twins will be born with a lot of hair?? isn’t that an old wives tale?
What a lot of work you did for your sister! Hopefully by the time you reach that stage, your sister can come over with her new baby and help you out too. I also sometimes think about the sheer amount of stuff needed to have kids, it’s kind of scary. I wonder if it’s just an American phenomenon, and that’s why everyone needs to drive huge cars and live in huge houses.
Sorry about the hair issue. I had always hoped that getting pregnant would help cut down on the PCOS symptoms. I guess not yet!
Do what I do–keep a pair of tweezers in your car and groom strategically when you’re either in traffic or at a long light. No PCOS for me, but between the sunlight and the mirror, tweezing in the car is often easier than tweezing in the bathroom at home.
Lol, my grandma used to say that about the $10 hooker. Yeah, she was a classy lady. 🙂 I asked her about it once and she said she imagined a $10 hooker had to work ten times as hard as the $100 hooker, just to make the same amount of money.
Dude, I DID have the facial hair. I had to stay in front of the mirror to fight the monobrow. I looked like a caterpillar was trying to grow across my forehead. But that did pass.
Now I have the yeti pelt.
I’m here to break all this in before you get there. I do it because I care.
I love you! Thank You!
Oh you bearded lady….that was hysterical!
hearing about your weekend with your sister makes me so much more irritated with your mom for not being there, which is highly inappropriate because she’s not my mom and it’s none of my business, but i’m a hormonal pregnant woman without the sense to keep her mouth shut.
and yes, ALWAYS do your plucking in the car where the sunlight illuminates everything and you’re already sitting so close to that little mirror. parked cars or from the passenger seat is best.
They tell me I don’t have PCOS, but I get some serious facial hair, and belly hair, and chest hair! It is such a nightmare! Some gals just get lucky, I guess! It did get worse during my brief pregnancy. Hope it slacks off a bit for you!
As always, you turned your own dismay into laughter for the rest of us. I am one of the many who appreciate it!!
But your sister is clearly the luckiest of all. You are a wonderful person to help her in the way that you did. I think that sisters learn to pitch in for each other when they have mothers that are emotionally nonexistent. That’s been my experience as well.
I pay a price for having thick healthy hair on my head…so much so that I wondered if I had PCOS when I first started trying to figure out why we weren’t pregnant. I have been ashamed for YEARS of the hairs that grow in two places that shouldn’t have them, so I feel your pain. I haven’t had hair grow on my face since puberty but I am not convinced that I have permanently escaped this fate, especially since my mother regularly complains about the hairs that grow on her chin. So, share any and all advice for combating this pesky problem!
Sounds like you were productive to the point of needing a trip to the spa! Hope you get a little R&R after all of that!
You’re a godsend to your sister — wow, what trooper!!
As for the hair bonanza, damn, I got no assvice to help with that. Pluck away!
Oh yes. I don a pelt on my belly. Luckily that’s one of the only places where it ended up, and in the small of my back. I’d like to tell you it goes away, but it’s almost three MONTHS post partum and uh, yeah, it’s still there.
I’m just saying join a circus now.
You are too funny, you know that? I was just dying laughing at your descriptions of becoming Cousin It! 🙂
Enjoy!!
oh I’ve missed you (and of course thought of calling every other day…but the time difference puts me at a huge disadvantage..hahah)
well, I am glad all is good, I am sorry that things are getting a little hairy (Ok, I’m sorry) as much as I want this transfer to stick, good GAWD woman you’re scaring me.
*hugs*